I deal with guests that are super crazy, like every day. Yes I sometimes can get snippy but 95% of the time I am lovely, charming even.  No one is ON 100% of the time and if you are, you are a robot.  I like being human.

For example, when I had to tell a woman about the plot for every Broadway musical and then she left to get cheap tickets, I said okay BUH-BYE, BIATCH… in my head.

I reserved all of my charms for this ridiculous but sweet inquiry that I just had to share. Enjoy my imitation of poor English. This is not to poke fun, only to vent and provide you with a chuckle!

 

Guest: I want see fire.

Concierge: Excuse me sir?

Guest: Fire department. Pretty building. Fire.

Concierge: Alrighty then. You want to see a pretty fire department.

Guest: Yes. Architecture. Pretty.

Concierge: Ok sir, do you know which fire department building you want to see? We have many here in NYC. Do you want to go to the New York City Fire Museum?

Guest: No.

Concierge: OK sir, let’s look at some pictures.

Guest: Red building.

Concierge: A red fire department building, of course, sir.

We started looking at pictures together of different fire department buildings. The gentleman said no to every picture I showed him. This went on for at least 2 or 3 minutes as I Googled everywhere I could think of in NYC.

Guest: It red and orange. Big. Pretty.

Concierge: Do any of these look familiar, sir?

Guest: Not yet.

Concierge (light bulb goes off): Sir, do you mean the Ghostbusters firehouse?

Guest: No, no, no? (The Guest looks perplexed and I can tell he just does not have a clue.)

I Googled the picture and showed him. I could see in his eyes that I had indeed succeeded in finding the red and orange firehouse which is no longer a firehouse.

Guest: Oh! YES yes yes! Perfecto and thank you!

Concierge: (just smiles) You are welcome.

 

No moral. Just smiles. Prayers for Egon.

 

Who you gonna call? CONCIERGE, the girl on fire.